Writer’s Block

Alright! I’ve been wanting to, and have been trying to write a post about several things for at least two weeks. For some reason I haven’t been able to. I start and then feel frustrated or unable to put into words what I’m trying to express.I have half a dozen half-ass written posts saved to my computer but nothing I feel valuable enough to share with you. This is bothering me because I want to be consistent with my blog not only for myself, but mostly for my readers. To get the ball rolling again so to speak, I’m going to share with you an e-mail that I sent to a dear friend last night about how things are going in Thailand. The flow of my writing felt a lot more relaxed, maybe because I knew I was writing to only one person and not a wider audience.

Hopefully I’ll be able to shake my blog posting cold feet soon and get back to you with some cool stories and reflections about my time in Thailand.

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Here it is:

“Sandy!

I hope all continues to be well with you!

I’ve had this e-mail written with the intention to send it to you for a day or two now. The internet in my room isn’t working so I can only send e-mails and texts from my office in school or someone else’s wifi hot spot and I genuinely tend to be forgetful/scatter brained during the day. I apologize for the delay.

However! I’m truly so glad things are coming together for you and your book and I think the cover looks great. There are so many resources available if you search hard/long enough eh? And for only 81 US, that’s not too bad at all. I’m so proud of your persistence and courage. Chapter 7 afterthought looks great. This additional research based insight is going to be really valuable to your readers and overall success of your book. I think it really puts your story into perspective for the reader as well. How are things going aside from your book?  Is spring looking promising? Snow going away If there was any? 😛

I miss B.C, especially the island. What I would give to take my last year’s trip again.

I’m missing home in ways and in others I’m not. I’m really starting to get comfortable here.  I’m getting used to teaching, the pace of life, finally liking the food, learning to speak the language, and getting more involved in the community. Some of the closest people in my life right now, even more than those in Canada aside from family, are Thai. And for that reason alone it will be quite difficult to leave.

But, I’m eager to see what will happen next. I don’t think I’ll be going abroad in the fall like I initially planned. I was, however, offered plenty of jobs to replace the one I have now, which is good to know if ever I were to return. With the amount of free time I have to contemplate my life and goals right now, I’m seriously considering going back to school for environmental science. It’s something I’ve always wanted to do and have been passionate about despite my social science degree, but was scared shitless of math. With having been in Thailand and from what I’ve learned of my capabilities, I know I can do anything I set my mind to if I want it badly enough. I’m feeling brave and might go for it. We’ll see.

It’s surreal that I’ll be leaving in a month. I cannot put into words how quickly time has gone by. I have even fewer words right now to describe the experience as a whole, because there’s simply so much to say and so many emotions involved.  A lot of teachers I know finished their contracts last week and have moved on to different pursuits at home or to different countries. The last week or so has been full of goodbyes, self-reflection and a little exhausting. Things are good though. I appreciate every day even more knowing I’m leaving.

Work is slow and to make up for it, I’ve been helping other teachers with high school teaching and I’ve taken up weekend work which extends my experience and helps time go by. There is only so much I can do on my own time in +40 and 80%+ in humidity. The heat is debilitating and rather ridiculous, not to mention April coming up being the hottest month of the year. Although, through experimenting with teaching different ages, I have come to absolutely love teaching grade 2 and 3. If ever I go abroad again, that is definitely the age I will be teaching. And I can’t wait to volunteer my time to ESL learners in Canada of any age.

My official last day of teaching will be April 7th, which is coming up really quickly. On that day, a Friday, I plan on taking a bus to Chiang Mai and then to Pai. I’ll be there for the water festival from the 13-16th  which is supposed to be a lot of fun. Apparently Chiang Mai is an amazing place to be during it, and low and behold I’ll be there out of coincidence. I only have my first week of hostels booked so that I can be flexible on my plans that will inevitably change. After spending time in Pai and Chiang Mai, I’m going to go back to Phetchabun to pick up my bigger luggage that is staying with a friend. From there, I’ll head to Bangkok. I’ll meet my uncle there and explore the city with him for a few days before I head back to Canada on the 28th of April. It’s pretty special that we get to meet, as I haven’t seen him in quite a few years.

I think I mentioned this to you before, about the possibility of taking the train from Vancouver. Well, I am!! A friend is meeting me in Vancouver. We are going to spend a few days in Vancouver and take the train on May 2nd to Edmonton, where I’ll visit with my sister for two days and have my parents pick me up that weekend. What an adventure, and the train was only $177.00.

As always, I’m thankful that we continue to keep in touch. ❤

Take care and we’ll talk again soon,

Jennifer”

I’m Melting Away. . .

I knew Thailand would be hot. This isn’t me complaining or feeling sorry for myself, but I’ve been feeling weak and ill adapted as the season changes from hot to hotter (over 35 degrees without counting humidity), and I’m not even in the hottest area of the country. Some of my quirky thoughts on the matter are as follows:

  1. My opinion on best coffee shops are now very influenced by the quality of their air conditioning. If I can’t see myself cooling off in there, I choose somewhere else no matter how good the coffee is!
  2. I feel like I could legitimately pass out if I walk further than across the street and back between the hours of 11:00am and 5:00pm.
  3. A cold water bottle is a god-sent. I often buy new, cold water bottles instead of refilling my  used bottle with warmer water. I know it’s not environmentally friendly and I do feel guilty for it every time. Judge me if you will.
  4. When I walk into businesses in a sweat, the employees and I exchange a smile and light chuckle. Then, I express what limited Thai I know and say “Lon mak mak mak” which means very very very hot!
  5. People walk around with umbrellas for reasons I now completely understand, the sun. People also manage to drive their motorcycles with one hand on the throttle and the umbrella in the other. Skill!
  6. I spend most of my days lately in varying ‘degrees’ (ha!) of discomfort and sweat.
  7. Cool night markets are very much appreciated
  8. My initial goal to travel south to the islands in April has now changed to going north to Pai and Chiang Mai where I can escape some of the heat.
  9. I take only hot showers. I quite literally cannot take a cold (or a lukewarm) shower. The water container gets too hot from being in the sun all day. On the bright side, the hot water cycle on the washing machine now happens ‘naturally’ and free of the extra charge.
  10. I now understand why people wear layers in the heat. This seemed counter-intuitive for a while, but I understand now that it is for protection.
  11. Eating, sitting and drinking are all I have the energy to do.
  12. When I get home from school in the afternoon from teaching every day, I immediately put on less clothing, crank the AC and lay for at least an hour.
  13. I understand why ice is so expensive.
  14. I only drink beer with ice, as the Thais do.
  15. I’m sure I’ll be buying the cold, moist cloth sold in a plastic bag at 7-11 sooner rather than later.
  16. I shamelessly eat ice cream at least once a day.
  17. I feel an incredible amount of respect for farmers, food vendors, labourers and even stray animals who are in the heat all day.
  18. In Canada, tinted windows are illegal. In Thailand, you would burn from the sun without them.

There you have it. The heat has been a bit much for me lately, but I still appreciate and love Thailand for all that it is.